8 Comments
Sep 12Liked by Janie Haddad Tompkins

Thank you for resharing your 2016 piece and your words of 2024. My younger daughter was a senior at NYU and living in Manhattan on Sept. 11, 2001. My husband and I had flown from Florida to Toronto for a little vacation the night before. On the 11th, I woke in our hotel and couldn’t get onto the internet, and I called the front desk. The clerk solemnly said, “Ma’am, you might want to turn on the television.” Ugh! It wasn’t long after the towers had fallen. It took us several hours to reach our girl. She was safe. There are lots more details, but I’ll spare you. When so many sport t-shirts screaming NEVER FORGET, I wanna yell, “how could we?”

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What a challenging time 💔💔💔

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Sep 12Liked by Janie Haddad Tompkins

dear janie,

thank you for sharing this.

this resonates with me a lot: "Gallows humor can be healing, but I do think it has to come from a place of processing the pain of a thing to strike an amusing or thoughtful note."

and i agree with everything in this paragraph EXCEPT FOR THIS FIRST LINE OF IT: "Seems no one wants to acknowledge or process pain at all. It is either too draining (which, fair enough, we are over-stimulated and wrung out) or just too unpleasant and therefore holds no value in our numb-out needs to survive a society that nurtures, hate, mistrust and disposable human relationships and frosty interactions. But in my experience healing takes reflection. Examination."

it doesn't seem to me that "no one wants to acknowledge or process pain at all." it seems to me that you do. and a lot of others. perhaps it's just that, for the people who aren't acknowledging or processing or expressing their desire to, those people are being LOUDER so it drowns out a lot of the other folks. but i hear you.

i also very much appreciate and resonate with THIS set of sentences, though i believe that the second one undercuts the truth value of the first one in a meaningful way: "I don’t know anything really. I just want us to all heal."

thank you for sharing your nuanced thoughts and feelings and kindness.

much love

myq

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This is such a thoughtful and compassionate analysis. Thank you for your time and commentary. 💔❤️‍🩹

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thank YOU, janie!

they say "we see the world not as it is, but as WE are," so for you to see my analysis as "thoughtful and compassionate" must also mean that YOU are being thoughtful and compassionate! and that checks out with my direct experience of what you're sharing here. THE KINDNESS IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE!

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Well said, and well written.

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Than you for reading and the kind words.

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❤️❤️❤️

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